First Past The Post!

Hello, good evening and welcome. As always, I am sitting here doing nothing, waiting for the day I can finally bugger off and die. But until then, I am starting my new blog, compliments of one Miss N.C Churchard, watching ants crawl around in the coffee machine, thinking of the best ways to kill them. Contrary to popular belief, Noel Edmonds probably won't be mentioned by myself, as I have realised he is actually quite a boring old fart. In a day of firsts, I had my first Fisherman's friend(the popular sweet - if you can call it that-not anything rude)They were bitter and tasted like shirt, so unimaginatively I spat it into the bin. Perhaps this is why the ants have decided to swarm around the coffee machine, which is placed, quite unhygenically above the bin. Miss N.C. Churchard has decided to allieviate the problem by tormenting and squashing one. I know what you're thinking but its ok because she's a vegan. *this is the voice of the mysterons, I did not squash the ant, it is still here, playing with it's gay ant friends, Anton, and Antony* Anyway, the bloody thing will not let me press enter and start a new paragraph, so I ask you this before I go...Deal, or No Deal?